I don’t remember a time when you weren’t nervous or shy or awkward. But, I do remember a time when you were undeniably happy and able to enjoy the little things in life.
Where has that girl gone? She seems to have been replaced by an anxiety-driven shell and I’m sorry but she’s got to go. She’s outstayed her welcome and is destroying you, piece by piece.
Focus on the good.
Focus on the happy.
Stop pushing away those who love you. I know you don’t mean to, hell… you don’t even know you’re doing it, but it’s what’s happening.
You are worth something, you just have to start believing it. Life is hard. God knows it is, but you are strong enough to overcome the dark times. You might not feel it, but you struggle every day and still get up every morning. You still do the best that you can despite feeling like the world is against you.
That is bravery.
That is strength.
Ignore the negative. All of it. Anxiety twists things and lies to you to make you feel weak. To make you believe that you’re worthless, that nobody loves you. But it’s lies. I promise you.
Right now you just need a hug from the person you push away the most and your heart is breaking because they’re not there.
It’s okay to not be okay. But it’s not okay to make yourself lonely. You need people around you. Let them love you.